Me and my friend smoked a blunt one day after he hadnt smoked in years he got so stoned he stared at a wall not moving or talking may not have even blinked for over 2 hours then finally looked at me and said I’m high as !@#$ lol
So watching tv last night and paused the tv to do something and when I sat down To return to show I forgot I paused the tv so I waited for something to happen and waited and waited and waited. Then wife ask what was going on then I realized I paused the tv. Duh
Hahahahahaha good one Ernie
One fine day in the seventies I got stoned with a buddy and got on my bike to cruise for a while on the Rock Creek Bike Path (I was living near Rockville Maryland at the time)
~ next thing I knew I was in front of the Lincoln Memorial at a hot dog stand - and it was getting DARK!
This was probably 20+ years ago but still funny. Me and a large group of friends were sitting around getting lit when one asked what time it was. Me being the helpful person tells them the time. That’s when they all started laughing. When I asked what was so funny they tell me that was a hour or more ago they asked. And someone had already answered as well.
I got so stoned last night that I completely destroyed my cannabutter. I was experimenting with sunflower lecithin and completely disregarded the whole phospholipid aspect, went into robot mode, and dumped WATER through my weed when straining!
But anyway, I’m so effing stoned that I still don’t realize what I’ve done yet… but I’m super pissed about the fact that dumping water seemed to randomly force this brown crap (which I later figured out was caused by me adding water, and thus creating a lecithin/weed/water mix) down into my butter, that just moments prior was looking immaculate.
I quickly remembered why I don’t experiment while stoned, but couldn’t remember smoking. Then I remembered my dank ass batch of chocolate chip banana muffins that I had sampled about an hour earlier. All of a sudden this brown dripping goo starts resembling something out of Ghost Busters II and it seems to be oozing out of my potato ricer in super slow motion. I have no idea how long I stood there.
Fast forward to me scooping out as much of the “impurities” as possible, and I put it in my fridge and waited for it to solidify. Correction… I THOUGHT I was waiting for it to solidify.
Flustered and baked like a 7-layer cake, I keep checking on the butter every 30 mins or so to see how it’s going. I still have no clue that I am waiting for something that can never happen at this point…
Several hours later, my muffin is wearing off. I’m really letting my gears spin trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. Then all of a sudden…
The part of my brain harboring my years of science education emerged from the fog. I just added phospholipids to butter and water… That shit was NEVER going to solidify.
So now I’m all bummed out and depressed about my stoned stupidity. I pack myself a bowl and sat outside on my deck with my bong to pout. A few moments later, I had smoked some pep back into my step! I had this brilliant idea!
I took to the kitchen, a stoned silly mess. I grabbed the box of Cheerios that I had shoved to the back of my pantry after finding out my family was slowly getting murdered by pesticides. I poured it into my giant bowl of aquacannabutter and began to mix. I was so excited to share my idea with my husband who was working away on the couch.
“Babe! It’s not a waste after all! I’m going to make edibles for ALL the animals in the woods!”
“Babe… picture it… Sicily 1912… you come home from work, you come out to your backyard and what do you behold?! THOUSANDS of different species of animals, gathering together, in OUR backyard, singing in perfect harmony!”
How much weed did you smoke?
“And WHY!!! Because of my delicious animal edibles!!!”
I decided that I was going to go spread the love ALL around the border of my yard near the woods… but it was 11:30pm, I was high as a kite, and the thought of walking around the dark, by myself, bordering the woods freaked me out. I asked my husband to come with me, and I could immediately tell that he was annoyed at my antics at this point. I decided to brave it alone…
4 or 5 paces out, I got spooked and darted back into the house. The bowl is still on my island this morning.
TLDR - I got so stoned that I was afraid to feed the woodland creatures my accidental edible mush.
Gimme some milk, I’ll try it lol
Today, I was wearing my shirt backwards for several hours, before I noticed. I almost left the house like that, too!
I’m retired - so I have SOME excuses. But the thing about Robert Heinlien that bugs me is this:
Yesterday I thought it was TODAY! (I had to check the PC calendar)
A week later, I wondered if I paid the bills
There are times when a retired dude loses all track
and Heinleins later novels all re-gurgitated the same people and timeline
It was as confusing as a translation of a japanese car manual from the eighties
“When did I split and spike the stem?”
~I had to look that up here in my strain/grow thread
But if everyday is the same, how would you know any difference? No problem, in the normal course of events right?
I HAVE TO POST NOTES TO MYSELF telling me what bills I have paid so I do not pay them TWICE
Oh but that’s right: When you get as old as I am, they even expect you to poop your pants…
Like I plan to do that even for a thrill
(insert random noise here)
*NOTE: Poster of the above is in no way responsible for beer or bong water splashed on keyboards as a result of laughter
- Don’t ask…
Whats up everyone had a stoned moment last night. Working on my exhaust for my shed and added a booster fan. Got it all hooked up and was like yeah that thing is working great. Turn on booster fan and like yeah that works. So messing around with speed control on boost fan and after about 10minutes and the whole time thinking it doesn’t seem to be doing much. Then I was moving some stuff around in the shed and found an extension cord that was plugged into outlet but nothing plugged into the cord yup that is right I unplugged boost fan to move cord and never plugged back in. Duh! It works much better now hahaha
oh yeah what happened to the original thread “I got so stoned” was looking for it and cant find it but then it could be another I go so stoned moment.
I got so stoned (IGSS?):
~ I was trying to put on my glasses when I realized I was already wearing another pair of my glasses…
I made what I named Loaded PotTayToes. It’s 4hrs later, and I’m baked, checking tags. Oh shit! I remember this one story about the spider gettin’ toked, the wife deathly afraid of spiders killed it and left it. Arrrg! What was that topic title? I hit the search and every mention ever on here about spider mites comes up. I start typing out key words, all spider mites, Damn you! Then I saw @FrikkinFrank had just posted to of all places this very topic. Serendipitous, crisis averted yay straight off I go ah lookin’ for it before I forget what I’m doing. Found it liked it & even bookmarked it. Then I figure I have a limited likes left, so why not use on here to laugh my ass off. So I started from the bottom up (cause yeah that makes since rn) Stoner! I’d see replies and think, Oooo this is gonna be funny when I find it… What!? Dependos, shit! Better keep going till outta likes. Made it to post 13. Can’t wait to reverse read those last few
does anyone know where i put my ppm meter?
It’s right next to the PH pen.
that’s good to know,now where is my ph pen?lol
geez,i’ve got to do better…
This morning I was cleaning out all my pots and getting them ready for their next grow. I put on some gloves to protect my hands but I could feel a small cut on one of my fingers (dry skin) so after I was done I went and put a band-aid on it as the water and cleaner made it sting. A little while later I could still feel the sting and when I looked I put the band-aid on the wrong finger. This won’t stop me from smoking while working lol
Well I did it again, smoking while working that is. I use to play this game called Aggravation as a kid on a homemade board made by a family member. I thought I’d make one to give my son and today I was putting on a coat of stain and I noticed that I missed one hole. I missed in on the template I made too. lol
Here’s the original made at least 50 years ago.
The one I’m making
That looks pretty neat. I’m curious now how the game is played? With a name like aggravation I’m not sure we could play it. We have had a ban on monopoly in my house for years because me and my wife are both highly competitive and don’t like losing lol.