Ok so im sure i’m not the ONLY one with funny stories about MJ and folks who are blatant, folks who THINK they’re slick, and folks who you’d NEVER think would, in a million years, lol. I did Amazon assemblies for a few years (exercise bikes, ellipticals, treadmills, grills, etc etc). MANY a time i came by and either they forgot what time the appointment was or thought it was one of those “cable company appointments” (we’ll be there between 12 and 5, lol). When i say 9, i mean 8:55, when i say 10 i mean 9:55. I know @oldmarine knows what i’m talking about when i say “early is on time, on time is late, and later than on time is unacceptable!” Anyway, you get there “on time” and you can hear folks say “just a minute” and scrambling noises when you ring the bell. And when you come in, it kinda smells like someone blew a bonghit in the potpourri where they tried to mask it many times it was the college kids in dorms and frat/sorority houses where i’m assembling bed/desk/dresser combos and they try to mask the smell but sometimes you get that soccer mom who thinks she’s smarter than the average bear with her masking attempts and you’re thinking, nahhhh, you didn’t hide it and that surrrre smells GOOD!
Ok, now the “ones you thought would NEVER!” I’m doing some blinds/curtains (with my handyman service company, not an amazon thing) and this lady has crosses on EVERY wall, pictures of Jesus, inspirational sayings on posters/prints, angel knicknacks on EVERY surface and shelf orifice, lol…and she goes to get me some batteries for the remote (yes, DECADENCE at it’s FINEST, these people ordered remote control SHADES!!!, lol) because the cheap Chinahhhh ones that came with it were D.O.A. I’m standing beside her when she opens a desk drawer and i COULDN’T HELP but notice 2 NICELY rolled blunts, one burnt about 2/3 of the way, in an ashtray, some trimming scissors and a bic lighter and she about slammed the drawer on her fingers realizing i might have SEEN that!! i said “it’s ok, i’m not judging ANYone ma’am” and she explained her husband has osteo or something and she has rheumatoid and i again said "ma’am, you’re FINE, you don’t have to explain ANYthing to me " and she sort of relaxed from then on, lol
Then you get to today…i’m doing this storm door (1099 work for the big blue home improvement store) and this customer comes out on his porch as i’m about finished caulking around it to leave and RIIIIIIIGHT about the time i SMELL it, he says “i’m SURRRRE glad they legalized it to where you can SMOKE at your house!!” and i’m like “mmhmm” and he’s like “You WANT SOME???” hahaha… i said "nah, i appreciate the offer, i have 3 counties to drive through on the way home and while doing jobs for L***s i’m not able to do that or i might not be doing it for them for long To ease HIS mind (so he didn’t think i was a NARC or something, hahaha, turning it down, LOL), i said “yeah, now the hardest part is WAITING TIL YOU GET HOME!!!” lol he laughed and said you know that’s right!!! What’s some of YOUR funny stories involving total strangers and MJ?
EDIT** BONUS STORY from my dum-dum younger years, lol… i’m driving home, BLIND one night after burning it down with friends, and i hit a license check. I’m sitting there thinking i got this, holding my composure, the cop who comes up to MY window goes to our Church…i’m thinking now i REALLY got this, lol. I’m all talking smooth, thinking i’m running game…he said David, have you had anything to drink tonight? And i’m like COME ON (his first name), you know i don’t roll like that!!! and he said well you’re not slurring and seem to be able to answer questions pretty quickly and concisely. But have you had anything to SMOKE tonight David? and i’m like NOOOOooo, no, nothing like that either. And he’s like you SURE??? and i’m like yes sir, i think i’d know if i did. And he’s like so you don’t have anything on you and i’m getting nervous but trying to hold it together and was like NO sir! and he said what about that bowl under your leg…DING that light that goes off when you remember you stuffed that there when you FIRST saw the lights ahead…LOL. he said GO ON and get outta here, i don’t wanna see anything like that again, what would your mom & dad thinK? I said dad would KILL me! lol. Have a good night sir and drove off